Who You Lookin' At?

The Pastor came from Matthew 14:22-33 and the title was "Who You Lookin' At?"

Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd. After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, but the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it. During the fourth watch of the night Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. "It's a ghost," they said, and cried out in fear. But Jesus immediately said to them: "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid." "Lord, if it's you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water." "Come," he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!" Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?" And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, "Truly you are the Son of God."

In a nut shell (because I didn't take notes), he spoke about focusing on God when things around us aren't going so well. The disciples were being obedient to God by getting in the boat and going to the other side, but with that obedience came "drama". Reading the verse, you realize Jesus told them to get in the boat and go ahead of Him. Afterwards He went to pray and doesn't consider them again until during the 4th night! I'm quite sure the disciples didn't think He'd be gone for that long (in such horrible weather). This is a great example of God's timing being super slow compared to ours.
Once they realized it was Jesus comign towards them, Peter calls out to Him believeing but unbelieving saying "Lord, if it's you, call me out." Peter gets out of the boat and heads towards Jesus and it's not until he realizes he's "walking on water" that he begins to sink and calls out to the Lord again to save him. All Jesus does is reach out his hand to him and pulls him up. They get back in the boat and miraculously the weather is perfect. They ended off with worship.

The first point I can recall is being obedient to God will almost always come with some hardships. Jesus tells them to go on but the weather is horrible. It's weird how God calls us to do things for His glory but He doesn't make it easy. And then it seems like He takes His time coming to our aid.

This passage also deals with Peter believing a little. There are many times when I am in that situation because I'm unsure of God's voice.
This passage then deals with the struggles of life. It's sometimes easy to start doing what God wants us to do because we have a little control. Your feet are still on solid ground, maybe getting a little wet but we can manage. It's not until our feet are fully emersed in the water that we fully have to depend on God because we can't stand on our own. That's when we begin to sink. We're looking at everything around us and it causes us to loose hope and faith at times. But it's at our "wits end" moments that God just reaches out a hand. The reason all He has to do is reach out a hand is because most of the battle is over. We've already faught through 99.9%, we're just tired. It's at those weak moments when we can no longer lean to our own understanding and must cry out to God for help and take His hand. Once we hold onto the Lord, He deals with our faith issue and in the end we must worship Him!

What God said to me was to continue to obey Him, even though it hurts. I feel Kenny and I have obeyed God in taking Ray in and caring for Him to the best of our abilities. We taught him to pray, to sing praises, to love others and show compassion, but for God to have that taken away from us after 2 years is just complete Bull! This situtation has been hell and if God would have told us this was how it would end, we probably would not have signed up. I've come to realize that obedience doesn't always come with an easy ride. Shoot! It's feels like we're on a darn boat in the middle of a storm!!

God also is still challenging me in the area of trusting Him. For some reason I don't do that easily. I love the Lord and think He's great at providing but when it comes to trusting Him with Ray's situation, I just don't. I haven't entrusted God to protecting him while he's away from us or making a decision in Ray's best interest. I mean, we're the Christians here and you want to put him with a Muslim family. Doesn't make since to me Jesus!

In all my frustration and misunderstandings, God has still shown Himself to be faithful and loving. In my mistrust and discontentment He still speaks. He not only tells me to look at Him, but to worship and thank Him for the time we did have with Rayon.
I need to get better at thanking God for Ray's life being spared.
Thank Him for Rayon being safe and well cared for the first 2 years of his life. Thank God for the millions of pictures I have had the opportunity to take.
For the first walks, the first words and first songs.
For the sleepless nights and the ER visits.
For all the diapers and clothes we had to buy.
And for having family and friends to support and pray for us during these past 2 years.

God tells me to "Be Glad", even on the day when Ray leaves. To be glad in Him because even on my worst day, that is still the day that the Lord has made and I should rejoice and be glad in it.

It is what it is, but I will commit to looking at the Lord more than at my circumstances.